• Evan Wolkenstein

Ankle Jewelry

  1. A necklace.

What do you call a thin band of color that you wear around your wrist?

  1. A bracelet.

What do you call a thin band of color that you wear around your finger?

  1. A ring.

What do you call a thin band of color that you wear around your ankles?

  1. Socks.

 Socks are ankle jewelry.

Many men are hesitant to wear jewelry because, well, whatever. No need to go there. In any case, colorful-but-classy socks can be a styley substitution for  bracelets, necklaces, and rings.

Here are some rules of “thumb-toe” for socks.

Crank it up, but keep it under control. Yes,  there is a bit of a “Happy Sock” thing going on out there, you don’t need goldfish, moons, or MC Escher on your socks.

You do not want to be “the guy with the socks,” so avoid Bat-Man, the Benjamins, and over-the-top colors.

Determine what color-palette you are wearing.

A) blue, red, black, white, and grey B) purple and grey C) Green, tan, brown, orange, and other autumn colors

Stick With Cotton

It breathes and the colors pop. Avoid polyester-blend “dress socks” – the thin, wrinkly things sold at department stores and menswear stores.

Now, pick your pattern:


Stripes: go with one color, and wear with grey, blue, black, or red pants.

Keep the stripes simple. We’re going for a bit of pizzazz, not “hey, look at my socks.”

Polka-dots: stick to one color.

Polka Dots

Only if they’re ONE color.

Argyle is Awesome

Argyle: Wear with wingtip shoes.

Try purple and grey with a grey suit or red and blue for…anything.

Gingham: Great with jeans, grey dress pants, or red/blue chinos (casual pants)!


Will net you compliments. Stick to blue, red, brown and purple.

Now that you’re a sock-maven

Cool shoes. Perfect cuff. Now, swap in some color. (Picture from nextlevelup.com)

Consider getting your pants tailored so there is no “break” – (“break” is the word for what normal people call the sag-fold that forms under your knee or near your cuff when your cuff hits your shoe).

Have the tailor hem the pants so just a sliver of sock peeks out. Not only does this give you a streamlined, clean shape, but also, it shows your ankle-jewelry. I’ve learned from experience that socks are an amazing “just because” gift. They’re fun and don’t cost much.

Next time you’re being dragged around a mall, try buying your girl-friend a pair of “just because”  earrings; if you’re lucky, she may surprise you with a little “bling” of your own.

Some sock brands to check out:

Banana Republic: Get some nice stripeys.

Richer / Poorer: Small company, great designs.

Lifetime Collective: Never heard of them? Fix that.

J.Crew: Yes, you’ve heard of them. But did you know they can be your sock purveyors?

Happy Socks: Now that I’ve criticized them…if you keep the colors and patterns under control, they can be kind of amazing.

Quiz time: which of these Happy Socks are a little too much of a good thing?

#patterns #socks

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